This morning at church was a little rough for me. All the pregnant mommies are starting to have their babies and there are just babies everywhere I look. Somedays I am ok being around babies, but this morning it was so heartbreaking. I just miss you more than anything :( I hate that I can't hold and love on you and give you all of my kisses. I hate that I can't hear your giggle. I hate that I can't feed you. I hate not getting you dressed in the morning. I just hate that I can't have you here. You are truly the best thing that has ever happened to me and it hurts that you aren't here. I am trying so hard to adjust to this new life of mine, but it is the hardest thing ever. I know God is taking care of you so well.... He is the best! He is even helping mommy and daddy each and every day so we can be strong for you.
I had to apologize to God several times today because I wasn't listening to Pastor Jason's word very well this morning because I couldn't stop looking at all the babies that were surrounding us. I was too distracted and I felt bad.
I bet Jesus was telling you about his trip to Jerusalem today and how people were honoring him by laying their coats and palms down for him to travel in on. This week is a really big week for what Jesus did for all of us. He died for all of our sins. What a lucky girl you are to hear that story from him and know him in person. I can't wait for you to tell me all about him.
I went shopping with Grammie yesterday and all I wanted to do was go home. It hurt seeing all the pretty Easter dresses everywhere we went. I purposely didn't walk by any baby sections yesterday, but of course they put their kid dresses at the front of the store. We gave your angel a pretty dress since we can't give you one. I know you would have looked beautiful.... You always do!!
I love you SO much princess.
"Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray The Lord my soul to keep. Guide me safely through the night and wake me with the morning light. Amen."
Sleep tight, baby girl. I'll come see you in the morning.
Your angel's pretty Easter dress <3
This picture was taken your first day at Cynthia's. {Mommy's first day back to work and you were still happy as can be <3}
Ellie is so lucky to be in Heaven with Jesus. She get's to hear the story about his Crucifixion and Resurrection straight from him!!
ReplyDeleteAnd, Brooke, YOU are the strongest person I know! I truly admire you & your little angel is so proud of how strong her mommy & daddy having been through the most difficult time they will ever face!
God is busy creating another perfect baby for you, one Ellie will watch over & protect for it's whole life. That baby is beyond blessed to have her as not just a big sister but a Guardian Angel!